From Fortunes (FreeBSD)...

Some days you are the bug; some days you are the windshield.
Permanent link: http://qotd.us/2195

From Fortunes (FreeBSD)...

Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone.
Permanent link: http://qotd.us/175D

From Fortunes (FreeBSD)...

Eat, drink, and be merry!  Tomorrow you may be in Utah.
Permanent link: http://qotd.us/AB8